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segunda-feira, 20 de dezembro de 2010

The house of emptiness

Once I lived in a house full of people, everywhere I looked I could see somebody drinking, singing, dancing, telling jokes; in that house I never felt alone. Whenever I needed to cry I had a friendly shoulder, when I wanted to go out I always had someone to go with me, when I wanted to rest I had someone to be my pillow and blanket. I was very happy in that house, living with all those people making my life better with their smiles and voices, they never let me feel the heavy weight of time.
Suddenly, on a night when I was out working I got a phone call and nobody in my house liked what I said, it was a simple and innocent sentence, but for some reason everybody who lived there decided to pack and leave me. When I arrived back home there was no homecoming party, there was no one waiting for me at the door, no balloons to celebrate the happiness of my presence. All I saw was a huge dark space, empty and full of sadness at the same time. The only light in it was the moon that somehow could maker her way through the curtains of my living room. On the floor there were many objects that the guests of that house had left there, I could find all the sort of things from a pencil to a love note.
I decided to clean that all and told myself that I needed no one to make me feel as good as I was in the past, I could be responsible for my own happiness and kill that feeling of loneliness that was taking over me. I opened all the windows, cleaned all the memories, but light simply refused to enter in my house again. I could see birds flying and leaves dancing by the breeze, I could see beautiful blue skies and clouds made of cotton, but whenever I turned my head back and looked at my house it was all covered with darkness and filled with loneliness.
I felt alone, I had nowhere to go, nobody to talk to, nobody to gift, it was just me. One more night came and I noticed something on the floor, it really called my attention so I went there to check what it was. I could see the border of something which seemed to be a picture, I took it with my hands and before seeing the whole image I could remember that it was a picture that I had taken with all the people in the house on a happy night. Still before seeing the complete picture my mind was filled with the memories from that moment, I had everybody on my both sides smiling and posing for the camera, that was a great moment! But when I looked at the picture I had the most astonishing surprise of my life! Instead of seeing lots of people beside me I saw just one, just one tiny brunette girl on my right. She had a smile which seemed to be created by angels, she had hair like clouds blown by the winds and she had a heart that held nothing but just the most pure and endless love. That was the moment that I realized that my house has never had lots of people living in it, it was just me and this girl, a girl who in fact meant everything in my life. Now that she is gone the only thing that I still find in my house is hope, all the rest is gone with her, all the rest is her.

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